Mark 5:25-34 chronicles an account about a woman who had been bleeding internally for twelve years. She was afflicted with a beastly medical condition for which she had tried everything, but she kept worsening for reasons that were not her fault. This disorder was a chronic physical drain, a financial disaster, a social disease, an identity assault, and a shaming pile-on. She was shunned, and who knows what else, because mean people have always preferred stationary targets.
Jesus was in the area, so she somehow summoned another round of spunk, snuck through the crowd she wasn’t supposed to be anywhere near, squirmed through all of the bodies, and brushed the edge of His robe or tassel.
In a crowd like this all manners of people would have been bumping into Jesus, but He experienced a power drain from her negligible touch and the woman felt her bleeding instantly dry up and stop. After twelve years, what was that like? Was it an electric jolt, or maybe a delicious stab of healing pain?
She began reversing course out of the crowd. Then Jesus halted everything and insisted on looking for her. Was this another vicious disappointment? Was He going to take the healing back because she wasn’t supposed to be in the crowd? Was He like the others she had tried?
After twelve years the woman would have become an expert at avoiding eye contact, at being invisible. But she could not dodge His gaze. She fell down in front of Jesus and her story spilled out of her. Jesus responded, “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace, and be healed of your affliction.” (Mark 5:34)
What? She had already been healed, and Jesus knew it because He had felt it happen. What did she receive during the second encounter that she had not received during the first encounter? Initially she was healed physically, but she had not been healed from everything the sickness did to her socially and emotionally. Face to face now, Jesus called her by a family name and gave her credit for trusting Him and healed her shame and made her whole.
Don’t you love it that Jesus could sense the faith in her puny touch of His garment? Don’t you love it that Jesus insisted on looking for her and continuing what had begun a few moments earlier? Welcome to the heart of our crucified and risen Christ. He has not changed. God in Christ always has more for us than we are experiencing. Jesus seeks you out because He has so much to offer you. Like He felt her brush of desperate faith against His clothing that day, Christ picks up on your faintest cry for help. And He responds.
The best thing you can ever do is move toward Him in prayer, placing your own story between you and Jesus so that He can demonstrate, face to face, how fond He is of you and how ready, willing, and able He is to liberate you. I do not know what it will feel like, or what form it will take. But I know your hope is in good hands with Jesus, because I too have been indescribably jolted by His wild love in response to my despairing and grasping prayer.
May you and I know the grace that is definitely not out of reach,